diagnostic all skate

i’m feeling better.  officially on the mend.  i know, that’s what i said way back when.  but i feel confident this time.  why, you ask?  well, because the diarrhea has stopped.  (you asked, i just tell it like it is.)  but i never got an official diagnosis.  i have michael’s diagnosis.  but he’s wrong.  so i thought i’d take guesses from the interwebs.

we’re gonna take this on house style.

but we’re gonna do it sans house.  i mean just cuz it now appears he really has two teams helping to jog his diagnostic brain doesn’t mean they could figure out my illness before i died got better.  plus, like i said before he’d probably kill me.

so, i’ve made the not so educated decision to take the doctoring responsibilities out of the hands of the doctors – or at least the people who play them on tv – and to give you full control.  it’s a much easier decision now that i’m not really needing a cure and i have complete confidence that you guys will come up with the answer.

lets start with the whiteboard of symptoms.

i was tested for both dengue fever and hepatitis.  both tests were negative.  michael still thinks it was dengue.  he’s wrong.  he’s all for the false negative.  so give me your answers.  what did i have?  make it as interesting as possible because i’m gonna make it my official diagnosis and tell people all about how i recovered from ______.

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footnote:  and just to clarify, on my own i would never list gaunt as a symptom.  michael insists it’s a bad thing, i however know it’s really more of a side effect and fits nicely in the perk category.

another footnote:  i think it’s only fair that i share all pertinent info.  and as much as this pains me, as much as i don’t want to say this, i have been informed by a real life westernly trained medical doctor that the dengue test probably wouldn’t have shown positive, yet…  and she was willing to go out on a limb and give a diagnosis – which the dr i visited the other day didn’t do. but i’m talking way out on a limb.  i’m not gonna tell you what it was.  cuz no way am i gonna give any credence to the off chance michael might be right.