shaken

i just felt the second tremor of the evening.  they’re very mild here and having no experience at all with earthquakes it took me a few seconds to figure out what was going on.  the epicenter of the earthquake was up near the burma/thai/china border and it was somewhere around a 6.8 on the richter scale. here in chiang mai they’ve said the tremors register about 3.0.  which, from what i understand, puts these tremors in the category of no big deal when it comes to earthquakes.

but for me it is a bit more than no big deal.  because it plays into one of my biggest fears.  the fear that something horrible will happen while michael and i are separated.  this has been on my mind quite a bit lately.  michael arrived home from the states just before the earthquake happened in japan and he’d had a layover at narita airport hours before the earthquake struck.  that moved this fear of mine from back burner to high gear (am i mixing my metaphors?  are those even metaphors?).  and then he headed to nepal.  and up into the himalayas.  and he sent me texts that said things like, “wow!  we finally made it.  crazy, wild times.”  which to my paranoid mind translates to “wow!  can’t believe we made it alive!”  or the one from this morning, “taking very scary bus ride through the himalayas today.  mostly downhill with barely enough room for the bus.”*  and i’m pretty sure by that he meant, “headed down a mountain in a death trap with no brakes!!”  thankfully, i’d heard from him earlier this evening and he said, “looks like we made it through the worst part.”  so i knew he had better than even odds of not being trapped under a bus somewhere on the side of the himalayas when i texted him that we’d felt the earthquake.

we’ve never discussed what to do if something major happens while we’re apart.  part of me doesn’t even want to go there.  but then i wonder if that’s wise or responsible.  shouldn’t we have a plan?  shouldn’t i know who to call in the middle of the night on a weekend if i need help and i need it now?  i like to think that the chances of needing a plan like that are slim, but with as much as michael travels (40 days so far this year, but who’s counting?) it might be a tiny bit more likely than i think.