i usually look so good in green

but i’m beginning to think this shade doesn’t really suit me.

michael’s headed to the states. again.  and i’m not.  again.  this time he’s headed to colorado.  where the temps look like they are gonna range from the high 40s to the low 80s.  and while we’ll be having some low 80’s here, that will be our overnight lows.  and during the day we’re managing to get into the mid 90s. again.  and – while i’m plenty jealous about the cool nights and not too hot days he’ll be enjoying – it’s really the opportunity to be there that i’m missing.

homesickness.

it strikes when you least expect it.

or maybe if i were more observant i’d have known this was coming.  being left behind this summer was probably the beginning. add to that the medical scares we’ve recently had. and then this weekend we were blessed to experience worship with worshiplanet – mark and carrie tedder just happen to make their home in colorado springs. so i guess it’s not really all that surprising that i’m feeling like a little bit of home would be nice right now.

and that’s got me thinking what/where is home to me?  i can’t really pinpoint it as a location.  texas? colorado? thailand?  they’re all home to me now – but also? they’re not.  i’ve heard that’s gonna be a life long struggle for us – figuring out just where we belong.  and while that makes me a lot uncomfortable, in an odd way i also find it comforting.  and in an effort to try to solve this conundrum i went searching for some lyrics (cuz that’s where the answers are, right?) – they go something like “home where the la la la la home where the la la la la home la la la la la la patiently for me” – but instead of finding them i came across this song.  and it hits the mark.

12 thoughts on “i usually look so good in green

  1. Home, where my thoughts escaping,
    Home, where my music is playing,
    Home, where my love lies waiting
    Silently for Me!

    Simon and Garfunkel – Homeward Bound

  2. Sweet friend, I’d be just plain ole mad. But, clearly I know it wouldn’t be doing me any good either. So, in solidarity, I will pray for this and you right this second. I will also pray a time comes soon for you to travel “home”, where ever that happens to be. (Or at least for a cold front)

    • thank you robin. yeah, i’d love to do the mad thing, but other than a momentary release i’d get from throwing a fit (when i do mad i do it big time) there’s not much else to be gained. you’re prayers are appreciated and a cold front, that would be amazing!

  3. Aww, homesickness does stink. I’m with ya on wondering where your home is. It’s different when you are more “nomadic”…I’ve made my home in places overseas, and then lived in some places overseas (and the US) I’d never consider home. The song you posted is a good one. 🙂 As for the cold front, if it makes you feel any better we’re still getting temps in the mid-90’s in my current neck of the woods in the US, and I’m praying for a cold front too! At least you have access to awesome food. 😀 Just prayed for ya that your homesickness would ease. 🙂

  4. I think you’re absolutely entitled to be green. Sorry. My best advice is to just go with it. Feel what you’re feeling and try to be good to yourself. Lots and lots going on in your lives right now. It’s natural to have mixed feelings.

  5. I am sorry you are home sick. I must say you have a great attitude about it though. The song does seem fitting. I will be praying for a cold front for you, at least a release of the hot hot season. I would give alot of things for your hot temps right now. We have had a VERY early and cool fall set in and I have definitely NOT had enough summer. Hugs to you~

  6. i think ‘home’ changes throughout your life… home is where you and your family is and gives you comfort… you’ll be home where you move/live next some way some how, it takes time. i like the song, totally nails it. you have perseverance like no one i know. we miss you and hope you come back to your ‘colorado’ home or even your ‘texas’ home. you’ll miss thailand when/if you leave for the comforts and differences… you are in a state of changes, but looking for comfort…. as we all are doing, but yours is a bit more intense…

  7. It is refreshing to read the emotional side of being an expat rather than just lovely photos. Thank you for sharing. I’m an American expat living in England and probably won’t go home for a year…

    Laura, HappyHomemakerUK.blogspot.com

  8. monica, just wait it out. winter will come soon…and though it won’t be as cold as colorado…chiang-mai weather promises something better than bangkok. and that’s what i’m looking forward to. 🙂

    the Lord is there with you all the way through. will be praying for you tonight.

    mink

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