wikihow – the king of fruit

igoogle knows me so well.  it’s my homepage and we’re close.  like hold your fingers up and cross them – do you cross them or just hold them together? – close.  one of the gadgets i have is wikihow.  and with wikihow on my side, i am unstoppable.  just this past week alone wikihow has offered me –

  • how to start a record label – i’ve never considered starting a record label, but wikihow says it can be done in 9 steps.  it almost seems like a dare.  i’m thinking about it.
  • how to make a unicorn popup card – just as i’d begun worrying about what i might do for a christmas card.  it’s wikihow to the rescue.  of course, i might go with the how to make a reindeer popup card thing, but that just seems too obvious.
  • how too spin bad news – this might be the greatest parenting tool ever.  i am no longer forced to answer the question, “can we have another puppy?” with, “no, i hate dogs.  man, you kids must have done something awful in a previous life to get stuck with a mom who hates dogs.”*

and just last friday wikihow helped me with a struggle i’ve been having since we moved here.  should i or shouldn’t i?

how to eat durian.  honestly, i’ve been on the i shouldn’t side of this one pretty much from the first wiff.  but ocassionally i think i should be more open, more willing to try new things.  i won’t bore you with the whole how to, but i do want to share the parts that have helped me reach my final decision.

it has a distinct fragrance that some people describe as “old gym socks” or “rotting flesh” and that has gotten the fruit officially banned from many public places in Asia

and

as a general rule, avoid traversing crowded public places carrying durians. consider driving home or better yet, riding a bicycle. if you do the former, make sure you open windows if possible to aerate the car.

also

if the smell threw you aback, consider wearing noseplugs

obviously, the smell is atrocious.  and pungent.  and once it’s in your nasal cavity, it’s there for life hours.  but even if i could get past the smell, i’m not so sure that the description of the taste would be cause for me to change my mind.

“a rich custard highly flavoured with almonds gives the best general idea of it, but there are occasional wafts of flavour that call to mind cream-cheese, onion-sauce, sherry-wine, and other incongruous dishes. Then there is a rich glutinous smoothness in the pulp which nothing else possesses, but which adds to its delicacy…” -british naturalist alfred russel wallace describing the taste of a durian, 1856

remember, we’re talking about a fruit here.  and i’m am sticking to my guns and no longer feeling even a twinge of guilt over my obvious lack of stupidity courage when it comes to allowing this particular fruit to cross my lips or enter my home.

*no, i don’t really say these exact words to my kids… i don’t really believe that having me for a mom is a punishment, maybe more a challenge and i don’t believe in reincarnation.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

add to del.icio.us : Add to Blinkslist : add to furl : Digg it : add to ma.gnolia : Stumble It! : add to simpy : seed the vine : : : TailRank : post to facebook

6 thoughts on “wikihow – the king of fruit

  1. thanks for that could use a little funny today!

    i wish i had more funny to send your way!

  2. I love wikihow. It’s on my igoogle page, too. 🙂 But I didn’t get that one.

    i wonder if they are able to geotarget their wikihows…

    Pop over to my place for a bit. There’s something there for you. 🙂

    oh, thank you. i love “somethings” 😉 made my day!

  3. You’re a great advertisement for Wikipedia. That fruit is too gross. I’ve never thought about telling my kids that–but I do tell my hubby all the time that if I die and he doesn’t do whatever I think he should with my children (yes they’re his too, but that doesn’t count) I will haunt him and make his life hell.

    nasty fruit is what it is.

    that should have him quaking in his boots!!

  4. Well, guess what? While shopping in our local Asian grocery store for ingredients for a Thai meal, what should I see? A huge mound of durian. Who knew?

    i bet they never ever cut a durian in the asian grocery there! it makes the whole store stink!!

  5. Come on…I need you to try it to satisfy my curiosity…besides Lullibell said orangutans love durian!!!

    i’ve always been highly suspicious of orangutans

  6. Ask your grocer for the dried fish. It’s smell is worse than the Durian. I’ll see if I can get the name of it from my mother in law.

    By the way, you might be able to find a Durien shake in some of the larger markets. It’s a form of fruit smoothie (with or without the tapioca balls), and you get the flavor without (as much) of the smell of the fresh fruit.

    If you can get past the smell, Durian is not half bad. Yes I have tried it!

    Try the jack fruit. It is pretty good without the smell. Ooh also the dried mango!

    we can get durian shakes from the street vendors and durian candy and pancackes, etc.. but none of that sounds appealing. at all. i’ve tried the jack fruit, wasn’t a big fan. with so many other fruits available, i think i can avoid the durian. 😉

    i did have my first passion fruit yesterday. it was lovely. i’m going hunting for them today.

    I need to visit the Irving Asian marketing, mmm, getting hungry!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s